Free Online Ordinations

One of the coordinators on Whose Wedding is it Anyway got ordained online to officiate the wedding ceremony of her bride and groom.

I am so excited they said the name of the website - Universal Life Church - and was pleased to find out how easy it is.

Months ago I thought this was not an option for us because the laws in my state (NC) say:

In the presence of an ordained minister of any religious denomination, a minister authorized by a church, or a magistrate; and b. With the consequent declaration by the minister or magistrate that the persons are husband and wife;

I guess I just assumed a minister associated with a religion or church would not be an Internet ordained minister. I was wrong!

Bye Bye April....

It was a tough April. I hope and prey May is a better month.

My mom has been in and out of the hospital. There is a chance she will lose one or both of her feet due to circulation and vascular problems. And, in case I haven't mentioned it before, the past 10 years she has battled (daily) acute Leukemia and Crohn's disease. This woman can not get a brake.

With both the mental and financial strain (don't think if you have medical insurance you are "covered") the only wedding thoughts I have had the past few weeks is to cancel everything. Just have the ceremony at Justice of the Peace with our parents and siblings. No reception party. No professional photog. No bridal shower. No bachlorette celebration.

And really, that's ok. My mother is much more important then any of those things will ever be.

The one positive thing I can pull from this situation is it really gives you a perspective on what's really important in life....and it is not centerpieces or buffet menus.

Sorry to be a downer.

Holy Shoe

Imagine wearing these babies under your dress.


They can be yours for only $1695.00.

Oh Christian, why do you torture me?

We Have a Date

After almost 3 months of not traveling I somehow ended up with 2 back to back trips. I was in NJ for my SIL's baby shower over the weekend, got home Sunday night, and 12 hours later back in the air to travel to Atlanta for a 3 days business trip. I'd complain, but its sort of nice to be out of the house and back on the road again.

We have a date! Friday April 9, 2010, HMMM 4/9/10...first time I am seeing that in writing.

My SIL is a teacher and that is her spring break next year...so it works well for them to come Wednesday or Thursday prior to help out with last minute stuff.

We have began planning our honeymoon and we get so excited everytime we talk about it. We are planning on flying to Seattle and driving the West Coast...ending up in Vegas. We hope to spend time in Seattle, Portland, Sonoma, San Fran, Monterey, Santa Barbara, LA, San Diego, Laguna, and Las Vegas.

We want to go to baseball games, eat at resturants we see on the Food Network, hear local live music, and see beautiful sites. We've done the resort beach thing a ton of times, and although we love that, we wanted to do something different for our honeymoon. I think this will not only force us to spend quality time togther but we will create great memories for many years to come.

OK...so we have a plan, and date, a dress....next up: Photog and Catering.

March Madness...Is it Almost April?

Tonight I sit in pain. Yesterday I had surgery to remove 2 wisdom teeth. Thank god for Vicodin. Its the only thing getting me through.

See, I was suppose to have the surgery 2 weeks ago. But the night before I developed a cold, and when I arrived the surgeon wouldn't operate on me.

Problem with all of this: its March in North Carolina. NCAA basketball. So that Eric wouldn't have to take yet another day off in March, I thought it would be fine to have my surgery the morning of day 2 of the tournament. Yes, we host this event. Yes, that means up to 20 people for 4 days in a row at our house from noon until midnight. I don't know what I was thinking.

On the bridal front I do have a few small developments

1. Ran into a friend-of-a-friend at Target this week. Told her about our Justice of the Peace plans. She told me that is what her and her husband did. And (here is the good part) the city of Raleigh has many locations that they will marry you at....not just some cold-courtroom-like-room. They choose the NC State Rose Garden on a Saturday afternoon. And it doesn't cost anything more than if we did just want the court house.

2. My Target wedding dress came. Wow - its gorge. Tried to take a picture of it (while wearing it) but I just couldn't get a good shot. I'm still watching a few J Crew dresses. I read somewhere online their wedding dresses go on clearance each Spring, when they release a new collection. So I'll keep watching.

3. My NC girls want to do my bachlorette party in NYC...which is so exciting. Not only because NYC is always a blast, but my NJ girls won't have to fly here.

Next weekend I will be traveling to NJ for my sister-in-law's baby shower. I will also get to discuss with her and my brother possible dates for our wedding ceremony. Since we plan to do this on a Friday, which means they will have to take time off of work, we want things to be as easy as possible for them. SO hopefully in the next few weeks we will have an actual date.

The Plan...So far

This past weekend I started to put together a plan and budget for the big day.

Friday (Wedding Day)
Since we will most likely have guests staying at our house, the night of our wedding we will stay at the Umstead hotel – your basic local 5 star establishment. So mid day Friday we will check in, get ready, and hire a photog to take pictures of us on the hotel grounds for 1 – 2 hours. Unsure if pros or myself will do hair and make-up.

Then drive ourselves to downtown Raleigh (Justice of the Peace) and get married in front parents, siblings, and very close friends. After, we all go to dinner. Place to be determined.

Friday Budget
Hotel: $300
Photog; $600
Dinner: $1000
Total: $1900

Saturday
The party will probably start around 5ish – this will probably depend on what date we pick and time sun goes down. Our house has an open kitchen into a large eat in area into our family room…which all of this is off of our deck. So we will probably move out some furniture and rent a bunch of high tables to be scattered in and outside.

We will hire a caterer to provide all of the food, as well as serve. I don’t want to be stuck in kitchen that day. So I am hoping we can have 2 people – 1 person warming food, putting it out, passing it out, cleaning up, ect…and the other person as a bartender.

I don’t think we have room for a DJ – especially if it rains – so iPod will be fine.

Saturday Budget
Table & linen rentals: $300
Catering Food: $1200 (50 - 60 people)
Alcohol & other drinks: $400
2 Servers: $300
Plates, glasses, utensils, ect rental: $200
Other décor: $200
Total $2600

So that would bring grand total to $4500 – which doesn’t include EVERYTHING. I still have to research prices and create budget for things like invites, dress/altering, cupcakes and favors. But I think there is some room to save some more money in a few other places:

1. Don’t rent tables/linens…use what we have and supplement with borrowed friend’s stuff

2. Buy and cook the food ourselves…just hire the people to warm and serve

3. Use paper plates, cups, utensils…not very Green, but if we had to save money

4. Friday night dinner – either cancel or not go as fancy…future father in law wants to pay but we really want to pay for everything ourselves

Our next step is to pick a date. Since my brother and his wife will need to travel here early Friday, I need to talk to them and see WHAT Friday works for them. Because we want to follow this up with a 2 week honeymoon, Eric will need to wait until 2010 to have the time off. So Most likely April or May of 2010.

Dress. Check.

Well, maybe.

I ordered last week a wedding dress from Target. Yes, T A R G E T.

Clearance price less than $50.

It got rave reviews. I figure if I don't like it I can return or use the material to construct something else.

They only had brown sashes for sale, so I figure I can make my own.

What do you think?

WW: I'm Back: Week 1

Back on the saddle. Or is it back in the saddle?

After this post last week, I finally got on the scale. I did gain about 2 lbs from my original 10.5 loss, but I am happy to say I lost those 2lbs this week with little effort.

Tomorrow I am having surgery to remove 2 wisdom teeth. Since I won't be able to chew much for a few days, hopefully I'll lose a few more by next week.

And Monday my friend and I are starting a walking/running regimen.

So things are good.

I Can See Clearly Now...

Finally.

Mr. We'll Figure it Out has came back down to earth.

Its decided. We are planning to get married on a Friday night, at city hall...then have a small dinner with our closest people...and the following day (Saturday) throw a party for the rest of our friends at our house.

I feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted.

The decision was made this weekend. We had a long (all day on and off) discussion about our short-term and long-term goals.

Short-term: We want to go on a cruise with our friends.

Long-term: We want to buy a vacation home in the NC mountains.

These goals are more important to us then having a traditional wedding. Even if we could do something for $5-10K...that's money taken away from our goals.

Just typing this, I feel so much better. I just think this fits us better.

And I know we made the right decision, because since booking the cruise, we are so excited. Its all we can talk about. We NEVER got this excited over wedding stuff.

I've Fallen...and I Can't Get Up

I have officially fell off the weight loss-ww-point-counting wagon.

It started with Valentines Day and went downhill from there. Last week a wisdom tooth started breaking through, leading me to not be able to open my mouth very much or chew salads and fruits. It was just the excuse I needed to eat macaroni and mashed potatoes.

I am afraid to get on the scale, in fear that I gained back most of, or all the weight I lost prior (10.5 pounds).

Reading this post and remembering how I felt that week, so motivated and energized, makes me more depressed.

I think what I am lacking is accountability. I am accountable to noone but myself. Which obviously isn't working.

Eric - Friday Night: "Want to stay home, watch a movie, and make calzones?"

Me - thinking: hhmmm...calzones are probably like 35 points each - "OK!"

I have lost all self control.

So I am pledging to blog weekly about my progress, challenges, failures, and emotions.

No more excuses.

A Craig's List Wedding, Really?

Who is this Craig guy, and why does he have all these lists?

Last year, when I was personally banning eBay (because I didn't want my money to go to Meg Whitman and her campaigns for Prop 8) I started using Craig's List. The drawback with using CL is timing. Every time I found something I wanted to buy, I contacted the seller, and the item was already sold. So when Meg stepped down from eBay, I went running back.

My most recent eBay obsession is looking at J Crew wedding dresses. Yes, the dresses are already affordable, but why not get it even cheaper? But after a few weeks of the J Crew dress I am hunting for, not appearing on eBay, I wandered over to Craig and his list to search for it there.

I haven't found it there either yet...I am still searching his other city's lists...but I was shocked to find so much wedding stuff on CL.

Now, i don't mean dresses, rings, decor....all that I expected.

What I am surprised by is all the vendors. Do a search for the word wedding under gigs or services and there it is...venues, caterers, DJs, musicians, photogs, planners, and so much more.

And, I saw a lot of free services....such as planners and photogs just starting out and needing to build a book of their previous work.

I am actually in contact with one vendor who advertised this:

Plan your wedding with ease.

All inclusive wedding packages available for as low as $10,000 for 100 guest.

Package includes:

• Wedding/Reception Location in Raleigh NC (all in the same venue)
• Wedding Photography (photojournalistic style)
• Invitations ( a lot to choose from)
• Wedding Cake
• Catering
• Wedding Flowers/Reception Centerpieces
• Wedding Officiant
• DJ for wedding and reception
• Wedding Favors (a lot to choose from)
• Transportation from Reception
• Wedding Coordinator for the entire day

2009 dates are quickly booking up. Email today for a consultation.

And over email she said I can bring own alcohol for a one time $50 fee (for permit from city). I am going to meet with them later this week and see what they have to say. It sounds to good to be true, so I am skeptical, but I am going in it with an open mind.

So for all the budget brides still looking for vendors, if you haven't already, check out your local Craig's List!

We'll Figure it Out

During our lovely v day meal, I thought it would be a good time for us to rank the priorities for our wedding day. I was hoping that after this exercise, we’d have a clear vision of what we both wanted, and what we were willing to sacrifice to get it.

I was wrong. Very wrong.

We are both not negotiable when it comes to 1. fab honeymoon, 2. parents, siblings, and close friends, and 3. a “really good time”. But that is where our agreements stop.

Important to him – all family and friends, live band, buffet

Important to me – photography, live ceremony music, not going into debt to pay for 1 day

He said things like “I can get a second job” me: uugghh no.

“We can take out a home equity loan” me: in this economy are you kidding me?

“I think we can swing $25k”
me: explain how
“We’ll figure it out”

What? This is his solution…We’ll figure it out….and he is an Accountant?

And he thinks we can go on the cruise this year as well as pay to have a bunch of trees removed from our property. Not to mention the TV he is thinking about getting (because only 2 of the 4 in his man room are HD) or tickets to the UNC-Duke game, which aren’t cheap.

So the conclusions we came to…
1. He will do some research to find a venue that we can bring in any food, liquor, etc ourselves (yes, I wished him good luck).

2. In the meantime, we will have an engagement party. Something small at our home.

v day.

This was our 8th Valentine's day together. I don't think in the entire 8 years we ever went out once for dinner. Vday has always been a night that Eric cooks for me, since I do the majority of the cooking every other night of the year.

Eric cooked a salad, yummy marinated sirloins, and double stuffed baked potatoes. I supplemented with a cheese plate and dessert. Oh dessert....I got 6 different flavors of cupcakes from the Cupcake Shoppe in Raleigh. OMG. We put each on its own plate and passed around so we could try each. So good.

Yeah I Won!

I have been MIA for a few days...Our home lap top crashed last week, still getting fixed. Then on Friday night my work laptop screen went 90% dark. I finally got a brand new shiny one today! I have a lot of catching up on both posting and reading!

I am so excited to find out that I won the contest I posted about in my last entry. I LOVE all Philosophy products, so I sure this one won't disappoint!

Thanks again Wedding Peephole!

Give Away

The Wedding Peephole blog is giving away a Philosophy Kiss Me Lip Scrub to one lucky reader.

The rules are very simple:

Leave a comment to get entered.
Leave a comment and become a follower to get entered twice.
Leave a comment, become a follower and mention the give away on your blog to get entered three times!

If you have never checked out her blog, and you like to shop, you are missing out! She has a great eye for fashion...and bargains!

Good luck!

Decisions, Decisions.

Ok, so Eric and I are use to traveling a few times year. We usually take 1 big trip, then a few long weekend type trips. Last year, for example, we did a cruise, plus long weekends in Asheville, Chicago, and Miami. Oh yeah, and 2 trips to NJ/NY to visit friends and family.

Since I travel for work and have a ton of miles and hotel points, usually the money we spend on food, drinks, and entertainment is more than what we paid for airfare, lodging, or rental car.

Last month we decided to not plan to travel for pleasure this year. This would allow us to save money toward the wedding, but also save our miles and all points for a fabulous honeymoon. In addition my brother is having a baby…well, his wife is…in May...so I have to do a trip for the shower, pay for half the shower, then go back for a week once the baby is born. And don’t forget all the gifts I will have to buy since I am a first time aunt.

On Saturday Eric’s parents dropped off their 3 (yes, 3) dogs for us to dog sit while they are on a cruise. On Tuesday I made the mistake of saying Let’s look up your parents cruise and see where they are today.

Which lead to us looking at cruises for several hours.

Then, to make matters worse, on Wednesday our Chicago friends that we met on our last cruise, called to see if we wanted to book a cruise with them.

So most of Wednesday was spent looking at more cruises.

We can probably fly economy for free, but the cost of the cruise and our bar tab will take a chunk of our savings….that should be for the wedding.

Or should it?

This is what we seriously have to consider…

Are we willing to make sacrifices to our lifestyle to have this wedding?

Or, is the way we live more important to us, therefore should the wedding event be our sacrifice?

I think we seriously have to sit down and make a priority list.

Just Have to Say IT

Slumdog Millonaire....

Best movie I have seen in a long time.

Sorry, just got home from the theater and had to share.

Registry Review

Warning: This is a long one…

My girls and I have begun planning a garage sale for the spring. The past few weeks I have started to make a pile of items I want to sell…and how ironic, many are items that a typical soon-to-be-bride would be registering for.

With that said, I thought it may be helpful to other brides-to-be to give my opinions on some items that are found on many bridal registries.

Since most of these items are kitchen related it’s important to note that I do enjoy cooking and entertaining. We eat in at least 5 nights per week, entertain our friends monthly, and have several large parties per year (40-50 people).

Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer – Sold mine on eBay last month. Not because it isn’t wonderful, it was. It’s just too big. I hate having stuff on my kitchen counters, especially stuff I do not use everyday. So I had it in its box tucked away and I would forget about it. It usually made an appearance if I was baking a ton of Christmas cookies, other than that is was too much hassle. The mixing bowl wouldn’t even fit in the dishwasher. Instead – I recommend a small hand mixer…I use mine at least one time per week.

Food Processor (mine is a Mini 5 cup chopper) – Another item I use weekly. I have gotten better with cutting veggies and herbs, but this thing is so quick if I have to cut up more that one or two things I pull it out. Just this week I used it to make breadcrumbs, shred chicken, and make fresh salsa.

CrockPot – Throw a few ingredients in, shut the lid, turn on. 8 hours (or less) later dinner is ready. Cleanup easy – especially if you use slow cooker bags. Need I say more?

Plates/Flatware/Glassware – My one comment on this is to register for sets of 12 or more. I love everything I currently have but when I purchased it I got sets of 8. As holidays and dinner parties expanded, I needed more, but everything I have has been discontinued. If you are like me, and like everything white, at least its pretty easy to find similar pieces when you do need to add to your collection.

Wine/Martini Glasses – I’ll be selling plenty of these at the garage sale. Only because I over bought. Since you can’t stack these things, keep in mind how much you can store. And unless you are a wine conosuier, red wine tastes just as good in a white wine glass.

Cookware – If you cook a few times per week or more, register for good quality cookware. I know it may seem expensive, but the good stuff will last you for 10 – 20 years, if not longer.

Knives – Same as cookware. Once you use good knives, you’ll wonder how you got along without. But, if you don’t cook often, stick with the basics.

Grind n’ Brew Coffee Maker – Another item featured at my garage sale. This thing is loud…no, really loud. If you are sleeping it will wake you up. Our bedroom is upstairs on other side of house and it wakes me up. If you live in an apartment your neighbors will hear. We are serious coffee drinkers and have found that our $20 Mr. Coffee is wonderful; it’s the coffee we put in it that makes the difference. And if you like using fresh coffee beans, your food processor can chop those too!

Folding Tables – If you look under every bed or couch in my house you will find a folding table (and probably a few dog toys). You can never have enough of these if you like to entertain indoors or outdoors. I also buy twin sized flat sheets as my tablecloths…they are long enough so you can not tell they are folding tables.

Towels – I have a closet full of good towels, yet use the same 2 or 3 over and over. If you register for towels buy one first – make sure you love it and will want to use it. Wash it ten times before you make a decision – some look great when you buy them, then after a few washers look like you have had for ten years.

Pottery Barn – Years ago I would flip through the pages and be in aww of the furniture…and in 2004 I purchased a couch and large mahogany coffee table from them. Where is that furniture now? Banished to the man room, because it looks like something that belongs in a “man room”. It has not aged well. Two years after I bought it I got cheap Rooms To Go furniture – which still looks pretty new. I have a ton of stuff from Ikea that has lasted longer. I would not recommend buying PB furniture. In fact, many things I have gotten from them, like bedding, have that old, worn look.

Wine Fridge – If you enjoy wine, this is a must have. However, beware of the size. Think about where you would put it and get out the measuring tape. They tend to be very long…which can be difficult to put on top of a piece of furniture. I have a small (10 bottle) one and had such a hard time finding a place for it. The only place that worked was the kitchen counter – which I hate – but at least it fits my rule of “using it everyday”.

Rabbit Corkscrew – Words can not describe my excitement for this product. Wine lovers, this is a must must must have.

Cookbooks – I couldn’t live without my classic Joy of Cooking…it covers ALL of the basics…or my many Barefoot Contessa books. All others are going to the garage sale.

And how could I forget one of my favorite items – Huggable Hangers. I purchase mine from HSN (home shopping network) but now they are sold at Target. I promise if you buy these, you will want to fill every closet in your home with them. Nothing falls off – not the tiniest tank top or the heaviest coat. They are so slim you create so much room in your closet (which means time to buy more clothes).

I think I have taken up enough of your time…I hope this will be helpful…but remember, everyone is different. What does or doesn't work for me, may or may not work for you.

Please Take Your Seat

While watching another episode of Whose Wedding is it Anyway I saw these seating cards. The bride in the episode actually did not use them because they were too expensive. She obviously didn't know what an easy DIY project they are.

Old reliable Google found the directions for me immediately on Martha.

If calligraphing the names and numbers, do so after the chairs are formed. If printing, do so before cutting the paper. The name goes on the panel for the back, and the table number on the panel for the seat.

1. To form each paper chair, you will need one 11-by-2 1/4-inch strip of card stock; you can fit 3 on an 8 1/2-by-11-inch sheet. Use a bone folder to score each strip into 4 sections: a top one that's 4 1/4 inches long, then 3 equal 2 1/8-inch sections.

2. Fold the strip at the top score line; the short section of the L will be the chair's back.

3. Bring the horizontal part of the strip down as shown, and fold at the next score line, forming the chair back and starting the seat.

4. Fold the strip down at the front of the seat to make the front legs. Use a glue stick or double-sided tape to secure the 2 layers of the chair back together. Set right-side up, and trim, if necessary.

If this design is to simple for your event, you can add ribbons that look like your chair sashes or other details that reflect your design elements.

Oh What a Night (and its not about the song)

I am sorry if I ramble on during this post, its my pain talking. But please read on if you will need to book hotel blocks for your wedding.

Yesterday at 5pm the power in my house shut off and I heard a loud noise. I assume a transformer blew up or a car crashed into an electric pole.

When the power wasn't back on by 5:30 I called the electric company. They said it would be back on by 7pm. After sitting in the dark for an hour, the cell phone rang to tell us the power would be back on by 9pm.

Would they keep pushing the time back?

Should we go to a hotel?

1. Eric's fourth and very important CPA test is on Monday, he needs to study every hour he can...no power, no Internet, no studying

2. Our dog, Taylor, is neurotic. No really, he has a prescription for Zanex. The silence and candlelight was freaking him out.

3. It was cold. Our heating system is electric. And we just used last pieces of firewood last week. What if the power never came back on - it was already 58 degrees in the house - would we just freeze to death?

I called a hotel I thought allowed dogs - they did - so we packed a few things and left for the night.

This could be fun, right?

Wrong. Very wrong.

I won't bore you with the details but to sum it up:

1. Eric's laptop crashed at the hotel, he spent all night trying to and finally fixing the problem
2. Our dog was not a fan of the hotel thing, drove us crazy for the first 2 hours
and
the
worse
part
.
.
.
3. the bed.
OMG the bed.
And the pillows.
UUGGHH...we both barely slept, and today are both is so much pain. My lower back and legs OMG. Its difficult to sit or stand up from sitting.

So finally...to my point...if you need to book hotel blocks, I recommend staying away from Extended Stay America. Their service was excellent. Their price you couldn't beat - $90 for King with kitchen. But the bed....eehhh...your guests will not be dancing at your wedding.

Now, maybe it's just the beds at this property. So if you are interested just ask to see a room and feel for yourself. I travel heavily for business, 75 nights in 2008 alone, and have never had this bad of an experience.

Should have stayed home and froze to death.